Vegetarian Vampires That Sparkle

I've spent the better half of the weekend watching the quintessential chic flicks. You know, the ones with Sandra Bullock as the 'girl next door,' the ones with the cheesy unrealistic romantic leads (these guys just don't exist), and the ones that require multiple tissues.

And for someone who really doesn't believe in the fairy tale 'happily ever after' I haven't been able to pull myself away from the television. I know the ending to every movie I've watched this weekend, either because I've already seen it (multiple times) or its so cliche and transparent that it would be hard not to guess the resolution. Boy and girl fall madly in love and live happily ever after.

Gag.

Except for this weekend, this fantasy world of "I love you's" was just what I needed. Going along with my last post, something weird is going on. I've ooh'ed and aah'ed at all the ridiculous monologues delivered with charm and boyishly good looks.

For the first time in goodness-knows-how-long my sarcasm has taken a backseat and that love-sick girly girl I always knew existed finally emerged. I may not whole-heartedly buy into the Hollywood notion of a love story, but I'm at least willing to give it a chance.

Last week, I finally got the closure that I've needed. I closed a chapter that had been never-ending for over two years. It was much easier than I ever imagined, and it was the first milestone in measuring how far I've come in my personal growth over the last eight months.

Now that I have a stronger sense of who I am and what I want, I have the courage and confidence to stand up for me and everything that encompasses. I realize that I don't have to change who I am to make a guy fall in love with me- all that does is strip me of my own self-worth, and to portray a false image to the one I'm wasting my love on. Because in the end, I need someone who loves me, for me.

So, thank you week-end chick-flick bender, for showing me that not every guy is going to insult my morals, that not every guy is going to ignore my inner beauty to only measure who I am by the number on the scale and the color of my hair, that not every guy is going to disrespect me by putting me down in front of others, that not every guy is going to take his own insecurities out on me.

But- not every guy is going to serenade me with a guitar, bring me flowers for no reason, or recite some prose about how I am the love of his life. However, my faith has been restored that if I let go of all the guys who have not been what I wanted, that the guy I want is out there waiting to be found.

And I'm ready to start the search party. Finally.

And now I'm going to go watch Twilight.