Why a Single Girl Read a Book on Marriage

Seeing how one of my favorite places on Earth is a library/bookstore and that I'm a self-professed word-nerd/book worm, it's amazing that I only finished my first book of 2010 this past week.  Blasphemy!

Even more amazing, is that when I was at the library a few weeks ago, I stumbled upon Elizabeth Gilbert's newest book Committed, just sitting on the shelf waiting to be picked up and devoured.  It's no secret that I have a literary girl-crush on Gilbert after reading her Eat, Pray, Love memoir and boasting it as the best book I read last year.  I was expecting to have to patiently put this follow-up book on my hold list, and was delighted to have it available to be checked out.

Much like her previous novel, Gilbert's writing style eases the reader into a friendly conversation; an invitation to an intimate journey, which ultimately challenges the reader to explore his or her own personal beliefs.  However, with Committed the romanticism is replaced with curiosity and a holistic exploration into the institution of matrimony.

Once again, Gilbert captures my attention from the very first page and holds it steadfastly until the very end.  Despite being nowhere near the same stage in my life, her words reverberate through me and really strike a chord, further proving her writing genius.

Here are a few of my favorite passages that I jotted down while reading, followed by my reaction:

"I'd learned enough from life's experiences to understand that destiny's interventions can sometimes be read as invitations for us to address and even surmount our biggest fears."

•  This passage identifies Gilbert's sentence to wed, when her Brazilian boyfriend was detained at the American border.  I have always been an advocate that everything happens for a reason, but I have never taken it a step further to examine my reactions to each event. I am realizing that my biggest fear is failure, and by leaving California, I was running away from the possibility of failure- but in fact I fulfilled that fear.  In facing this truth, I am uncovering that California is indeed where I want to live, where I want to thrive, and for once, I want to face my fear and overcome it.

"...so we live in danger of becoming paralyzed by indecision, terrified that every choice might be the wrong choice."

• The last few months for me have been decision by indecision, if that makes any sense whatsoever.  The thought of making the wrong choice, leads me to not make a choice at all, which is in fact, making a choice. Not deciding to decide. Whoa, psychobabble much? I have been known to make irrational, impulsive decisions, by default I always seem to follow my heart.  Moving to California, following my heart, great emotional decision, bad financial decision.  Moving home to Ohio, again following my heart, bad emotional decision, bad financial decision. Ok, so I'm not good at decision-making. But I am learning from my mistakes, and since I'm on the verge of moving back to California, I am making rational preparations, so this time it is a great emotional and financial decision.

"If we are at all self aware, we work hard to keep these more dicey aspects of our natures under control, but they don't go away."

•  Holy self-awareness, batman. I'm pretty sure that's been the overriding theme of this blog for quite awhile.  I'm sure it's hasn't been the most pleasant reading material, but let me assure you that I am coming out of this process renewed and an overall more positive person.  This passage reminds me that all these negative qualities I have unearthed in myself can't and shouldn't be ignored because in doing so, they will resurface.  But I can exercise control over them, and lead a more fulfilled emotional life.  Amen, sister.